Jayanti Tamm: Cartwheels in Sari
Book Club Discussion
June 8, 2009. Queenie C chats with Jayanti Tamm about her memoir,
Cartwheels in Sari.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
It
was such a pleasure to meet you and listen to you read and discuss your book. Thank you for the opportunity to ask you a few question for future
readers.
Looking back, does it make you sad to realize that you thought you killed Munu because of your actions?
As
a child, I believed everything that Sri Chinmoy said, so when he proclaimed that he had occult powers and had the ability to see the past, present,
and future, I thought he could do anything. He also told us that our own actions produced karma, so I was convinced that I was responsible for everything
that went wrong, including the death of my pet bunny. However, it doesn't make me sad to reflect on my prior beliefs because that was my true
faith at the time.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
As
you recounted your life for this book, how and what did you feel?
It
took me a very long time before I felt that I could write about my past with enough distance to tell my story with as much objectivity as possible
and without bitterness and anger. Writing this book was a very therapeutic process for me because it gave me a reason to open up my past which I
had kept closed off for such a long time. It felt liberating.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
Your
dad stood a while after you left with the Guru even after knowing the truth about him. Did you ever ask him why?
I
have asked my father why he remained a disciple for so many years even after he had major doubts, and he told me that part of him just was not
ready to let go of what he had invested so much of his life. He said that he was convinced that the cult was ready to unravel, and he had wanted
to see what would happen to it.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
Your
brother remained involved with that life and severed all ties with your family. How did your family react to that?
Severing
all ties from former disciples is standard practice in the Sri Chinmoy Center. Having a clear separation between those inside the group and those
outside the group, is a very typical characteristic of all cults. My brother is still a devout disciple, and so is my aunt. They have not spoken
to me in years. While it is painful, it is not surprising. They are behaving in the way that Sri Chinmoy ordered his obedient disciples to behave.
He told his disciples that family doesn't matter, nothing else mattered but obeying and serving his own commands and edicts.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
Is
this "organization" still in existence today? Who took over after Sri Chinmoy's death?
Even
though Sri Chinmoy passed away in 2007, the Sri Chinmoy Center is still very active. From what I have heard, it is run by a committee of elders
who attempt to run the cult in the same vein that Sri Chinmoy did; they are still very active in putting on events to recruit new followers and to
gain publicity. In that way, nothing has changed.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
You
are married now. How did you meet your husband?
I
actually met my husband in a bar in the East Village in Manhattan. I approached him and asked him if he wanted to dance. The rest is history.
BCQ: Your husband was there at the discussion where we met. What was his initial reaction to your life story?
Jayanti: My husband has been incredibly supportive of Cartwheels in a Sari. Believe it or not, I hid my past from my husband for a
long time, trying to avoid telling him about my former life as the 'chosen one' in a cult. Initially, I was worried that I would scare him away,
and then later on I myself didn't feel ready to confront my own past. Of course, little by little, I told him about my unusual life. Throughout
the process of writing my memoir, he has been wonderful in asking provocative questions that I feel helped me shape the book.
BCQ: Now that you have your own child , how will you use your own life lessons while raising her?
Jayanti: I am hoping that my daughter will never willingly hand over the reigns of her life to another person. I would like to instill in
her the confidence and the knowledge that she should be the 'guru' of her own life.
Book Club Discussion: Interview with Jayanti Tamm
Will
you be writing any more books?
I
am currently working on a novel that is far removed from my own life story. I'm eager to enter the realm of fiction and writing about characters
very different from me.
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