Robert Leleux: The Memoirs of a Beautiful Boy
Book Club Discussion

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

I found it interesting that on the cover of your paperback book, both the title and your name were printed in all lowercase letters. Was there a specific reason for that?

I know! Isn't that peculiar? I have no explanation for that at all. I suppose it was an attempt by the design and marketing departments to make the book appear contemporary and edgy? Rather than sweet and flowery? I really don't know. I find that, after a certain point, no one explains anything to you. But I do find that now, other folks often write the title in lower-case letters, as though fearing to violate some unknown punctuation. Isn't that funny?

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

A partial quote from the book states, "...wondered why Everything's Going to be Alright is always the perfect thing to say to a crying person, regardless of how improbable any sort of happy resolution to their problems may be." What would you suggest someone should say instead?

Golly. I suppose I now believe that the very best course is to say as little as possible. I find that when someone is crying, they often just need you to be quiet and listen. That way, they don't end up feeling managed or handled, and they can just let out a good cry. I also recommend a fair amount of back-patting or hair-stroking, when appropriate. Perhaps a few "there, there's" will do nicely. But I've recently decided that I have absolutely no advice to offer anyone in crisis, and that actually, even good advice is probably worthless to most people. As my grandfather used to say, "Fools won't heed it, and wise men don't need it." So now, I'm what's known as "a good listener. "Ugh.

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

"Because if I could match my experience to the character in a book or a movie, it seemed possible I was heading towards some glorious future." What character in a book or movie would you match your present life to and why?

You know, I feel like I've spent my entire life relating my thoughts, feelings, or experiences to those of book and movie characters. I suppose we all do this to an extent, but it seems remarkable to me, the real POWER these characters can have over your life. So that you can actually end up making important decisions based on the behavior of fictional characters! Which on a certain level is absolutely necessary and human, and on another, completely absurd!

Now, the figures who seem ALWAYS to remain with me are: Jane Eyre, the Mitford Sisters, Billy Elliot!, Max Fisher (from the movie Rushmore), and Aurora Greenway (from Terms of Endearment).

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

What are your relationships with your mother, father, grandparents and "in-laws" like now? Did you ever meet your half-siblings?

I have absolutely marvelous relationships with my entire family. Isn't that a lucky break? My mother actually lives with my partner and me, here in New York City. My father and I speak on the phone everyday, and see each other every chance we get. His parents have passed away, but I was reunited with his mother before she died, which was lovely. And I'm particularly close with my mother's parents. I'm constantly flying in to visit them, and chatting with them over the phone. I have met my father's children, several times, and though we're not especially close, I think they're completely terrific kids. And of course, I absolutely worship Michael's mother. His father passed a few years ago—and the longer he's gone, the more I admire him. He was an exceptional person, really. Totally self-made, with such remarkable integrity and moral vision. I appreciated him while he was alive, but when I get to heaven, I want to apologize for not REALLY appreciating him.

You know, part of publishing this book involved realizing that EVERYONE, no matter how well-adjusted, walks through life with some level of frustration regarding their family! And I think a very good remedy for that frustration is writing—because you can absolutely exorcise all that drama, by capturing it on the page. I never like to think of writing as therapy—because I think that writing is a craft and hard, hard work. So I don't think it's anymore therapeutic than, say, carpentry or gardening. BUT. In the sense that writing allows you to consider your past intellectually—to really flush it out of your body, look at it on white paper, and decide what you really think about it—then I think writing can be quite therapeutic. It can allow you to complete any lingering anger you might have towards your family, and begin to develop some compassion about where they might have been coming from. I know writing this book did that for me. By the end of the book, I think I started to see where they'd been coming from far more than where I'd been coming from!

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

Your mother had some interesting metaphors and sayings. What are some of your favorites? Do you have any of your own that you use regularly?

Oh yes. I think a key part of being Southern is quoting your mama. Constantly. To the point where it gets really annoying for Yankees. Now, let me think. "That looks like my elbow," I say all the time. Or "that's so ugly, it'll have to slip up on the dipper," which I think is hilarious. Or, "that smell could knock a dog off a gut-wagon," which is vulgar, but to the point. Or, "well hasn't this gone from quail eggs on toast to shit on a shovel?" That's very useful, I think. And, ooh. This I think of all the time, "You'd better be careful, Robert, or you're going to end up in a crowd by yourself." Which is something that often occurred to me while writing my book. Yikes.

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

Book Club Discussion: Interview with Robert Leleux

Can you tell us what you are working on next?

Well, I've been busy. I've almost finished writing a screenplay with my darling friend K.C. Rodriguez, who is a thoroughly brilliant woman. And I've been writing a ton of articles lately—many for The Texas Observer. I was just added to their masthead, which was extremely thrilling, as it was the great newspaper of my childhood. And I had a big piece in the Sunday New York Times a few months ago, about my grandmother JoAnn, who has Alzheimer's. Since then, that piece has grown into a book, to be called The Living End, to be published by St. Martin's Press next year. It's a sort of memoir about Alzheimer's, and the strange, tragic, and magical influence it's had on our family. So that's about all for now, thank goodness. But it's been a very nice thing to spread my wings a bit.